Why must zombie packs smell like… well, zombies?!?!

This was originally going to be another edition of Face-off between Beucle Miracle Pack vs. Skin1004 Zombie Pack.  Here’s the thing… I can’t tell if they really work or not.  I can’t handle the smell long enough to keep them on and I can’t keep them on long enough to tell if they work.

It’s just a guess on my part but I like to think they call these masks ‘zombie’ packs because once you apply the product on your face, it tightens and pulls your skin as it dries. The mask starts to crack and distort facial features to a point where I can arugably accept some resemblance of zombiness.

I just don’t understand why it has to smell like overripe zombie ass on top of that.

Specific products in question are BeuCle Miracle Pack and Skin1004 Zombie Pack.

Beucle skin1004

Both products come in 16-count pack with a brush and “activator” solution.  You mix the powder which comes in sealed single-use plastic containers and the solution.  Neither products specify how much of the solution to add.  They have suggested amount of the solution listed in the direction but it’s not helpful.  For instance, Skin 1004 suggests 3ml of the solution per each use.  However, the tick marks on the solution bottle do not indicate volume – it is not at all clear whether the amount is ml or oz.  It has a zero on one end, and 15 on the other.  Your guess is as good as mine when it comes to the in between.

Anyway, let’s say you manage to figure out the ideal powder to solution ratio.  Hurrah.  You get a gold star.  Next comes the mixing.  The brush head is about the same size as the opening of powder containers which make it very difficult to stir and combine the mixture without sending powder flying everywhere.  If you succeed in overcoming that, congratulations.  Now you get to apply the mixture.  Try not to spill or let the mixture drip all over you.  Impossible, you say?  My point precisely.

For me the single biggest hurdle and one that was unsurmountable for both of these masks was the fragrance.  My 30s brought me many gifts, migraines being one of them.  The ‘egg-rotting-in-chemical-toxic-waste’ smell of these masks triggered headaches which, based on my pattern, would likely have turned into migraines had I not washed the masks off immediately.  BeuCle must have anticipated potential issues because they added Damask Rose as one of their ingredients/scents, which is unfortunate because…

Have you ever let a vase of flowers sit around too long without changing the water?  You know that smell, right?  Imagine taking a bath in that water while eating pickeled eggs.  That is either a form of Thai spa ritual or facial mask gone wrong.  I know which way I’m leaning.

In all fairness, my skin did feel smoother and brighter afterwards.  However, I’m drunk enough on all these k-beauty products that I expect at least that much from any mask or pack I try.  It is rewarding to watch these masks do its thing and distort your face, but not enough to risk the soundness of my marriage.  The last time, and likely the final time, I tried one of these zombie masks, my husband came home, smelled the air, looked at me, said “text me when you’re done with that mask” and walked right back out.  I’m done.  Time to let him know it’s safe to come home.

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